Angel's Pain
by Exileian
Summary: Slightly AU: Told from Ken's POV, an overview from a day in the flower shop to the end of a mission and after. FarfxKen, AyaxKen. Chapter 8 up.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: No, I don't own Weiss Kreuz. I wish I did, though. It'd make me happy. But I don't own it. So don't sue me. I'm saving up for a Gamecube. I need the money. 

Angel's Pain   
Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like the pen. 

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like Ken. 

            So I work at a flower shop. So what? Don't tease me. I used to be a J-Leaguer! I was the best player. Until I got kicked out. Kase's fault. I think. God, I still can't stand that I had to kill him. Why couldn't it have been anybody but him?! 

            Stop wallowing in memories. It's not your place. 

            Besides, there's people coming in. And they're asking for information. Everybody else is busy. That means I get to explain everything. 

            "Excuse me…what's your prettiest flower?" 

            Nice. Ask my opinion, why don't you… 

            "Our roses are nice." The girl wrinkles her nose. 

            "Too expensive." 

            "Ehn…lilies are nice, and they smell good." Omi nods approvingly. He likes all the flowers, but I guess he thought my choice was good. The girl looks at the lilies, which I have pointed out, and touches the glass case gingerly. 

            "Mmmm….I like these….I'll take a bouquet." I open the case and start pulling out the flowers, one by one, and arrange them neatly. Wrap them in tissue paper, tie them with a ribbon, hand them to the girl, yadda yadda yadda. Normally, the people in here don't buy flowers, they're just in here to bask in the Sunlight of the Flower Shop Guys. I wonder how Aya stands it, with all these girls around. He's the most emotionless of us all… 

            Something hits my arm. I turn to see what. Omi's holding a pen, and he's poking my arm with it. 

            "Stop." 

            "I'm bored. There's nobody buying flowers." 

            "Someone just bought some." Yohji walks in, coffee in hand. 

            "What's new, Omi? Ken?" He doesn't address Aya. Aya's outside, moving flowers for a new display. Most of the girls are hanging around outside to look at Aya. 

            "Nothing. I wish something would happen." Omi flips the pen up in the air, and Yohji catches it. 

            "Be careful what you wish for." He flips the top off the pen, which clatters to the floor, and scribbles on a piece of paper in front of Omi. "You just might get it." Omi tries to grab the pen, but Yohji's too tall. 

            Secretly, I agree with Omi. I want something to happen. We haven't had any new missions for awhile, and we're all getting restless. Schwartz hasn't shown up for some time, no subtle hints, nothing. That's kind of a good thing; Farfarello always gave me the creeps. 

            Yohji hands me his coffee in order to properly fend of Omi, who wants the pen back. It's a sudden movement, and a little flies from the mug onto my hand. It's hot. I hiss and pull the burning hand to my mouth, inhaling the taste of burning coffee and flowers. I plant my tongue firmly over the burning part of my skin, and it cools. But the coffee leaves a dirty taste in my mouth when I pull my hand away. I wipe my hand on my pants and grip the coffee mug again. It's warm, and I'm cold. 

            "My pen!"   
            "Mine!" Aya comes back in, sees Omi trying to reach the pen Yohji's holding just out of his reach, and sighs. He gives me a look that says, 'Why didn't you stop this?' I just shrug and look into the coffee. My face looks back at me, same hair, same eyes. If I had been wearing my goggles, they would have been reflected in there, too; but that's my assassin gear. No goggles during the day. 

            As Aya passes Yohji and Omi, he plucks the pen from Yohji's hand and flips it into the back of my head. I think it was a miss (he was probably aiming for Omi), but it hurt nonetheless. I swear quietly and rub the back of my head. 

            "Nice aiming, Aya." He says nothing, as usual, and just goes back to watering the flowers. 

            "Yeah, NIIICE aiming." Yohji grins and leans against the desk. He reaches for the coffee and pulls it from my hands without warning. More coffee spills onto my hands and burns. I put my other hand, my right hand, which the coffee spilled on, up to my mouth and try to stop the burning. 

            "Thanks a lot, Yohji," I snap through my hand. The coffee still tastes nasty, like something raw and old and metal. I blink. 

            Metal? 

            I look at my hand, wondering if maybe I'm bleeding. Blood tastes like metal sometimes. No, my hand is fine, just a little wet from where I had my tongue. The coffee is gone. 

            "Ken?" Omi pokes my arm. I wipe my hand on my shirt and look at him. 

            "What?" 

            "…nothing." He turns back to keep writing and finds the pen gone again. Yohji's got it. A small fight erupts, and several girls flee the store. I snicker. Nice going, Yohji, Omi. You just got rid of possible customers. More like possible worshipers. We seem to have a lot of those here in the flower shop. 

            Aya comes back in from the backroom, holding two small Styrofoam cups. He walks by the fight and hands one to me. I take it, nodding my thanks, and sip whatever clear liquid is inside. Water. Lovely. Doesn't that man drink anything else? Soda once in a while would be nice…I guess we're out. 

            As I sip the water, Aya looks outside. Most of the girls are heading home, and the sun is starting to set. Time to close up. He looks over at me, at my cup, which is half full, and then at the fight. Yes, Omi and Yohji are still fighting. Yohji has Omi in a headlock, and Omi's reaching for the pen. Still. 

            I get Aya's message and dump the remaining water from my cup onto Yohji and Omi's heads. They sputter and drop each other, falling to the floor. 

            "Ken!!" Omi stutters indignantly. "That was mean!" 

            "Blame Aya," I say, smirking, and toss the cup onto Yohji's head. He glares and tries to trip me on my way out. I step over his foot, dodge his arm, and head out the back door to my room. They get to close up tonight; I made the most sales today. 

            In my room, I ponder taking a shower. I took one last night. Is it ok to take one now? 

            Yes…I fling my clothes onto my bed and head into my bathroom. I flip on the shower and hope it warms up fast; I'm freezing. It's late autumn, and this place isn't very well heated. 

            I step into the shower fast and shut the door. It's nice, to be in the tiny shower, with warm water running down you. I grab the soap and a washcloth and clean myself from top to toe. Then I wash my hair. 

            While the soap runs out of my hair and off my back, I shut my eyes and lock my hands behind my neck. It's relaxing here. Just being in the shower, alone, with the warm water and soap and feeling clean… 

            I flick off the water after about five minutes and step out. It's freezing! I grab a towel and dry myself off as fast as I can. I wrap the towel around my waist and grab for my t-shirt and pants, what I usually wear to bed. Two seconds and they're on, I'm lying in bed, reaching for the sheets. I shut the light off when I came out of the bathroom. Before I can reach the sheets, though, I glance at my window. The curtains are halfway shut. I get up and close them, just to keep in all the heat I can. 

            I crawl back into bed and cover myself with the sheets. I shut my eyes slowly, and fall asleep quickly. 


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Gods. I write too much, too fast. I don't wait for reviews, I just…write. Anyway, I don't own Weiss Kreuz or anything in it. That means Ken's not mine. Or Farfie. Or Omi, or Yohji, Or Aya, or anybody else in Weiss and Schwartz. And Schreient. But I don't use Schreient in this story. 

Angel's Pain   
Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like the mission. 

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like the refrigerator. Wait. That's mine, too. 

            I sit up the next morning and blink. Somebody opened my curtains, and sunlight is streaming in. I kick the sheets off my legs and get up, stretching, yawning, reaching for my clothes. There's a fresh pair hanging off the back of a chair. I sip off my nightclothes and put on my florist outfit. Apron over the usual t-shirt, run my fingers through my hair, check my appearance in the mirror. Acceptable, but not perfect. Meh. 

            I leave the room and shut my door behind me. Out into our little 'kitchen', where we keep food and drinks in a refrigerator as tall as I am. I reach inside and fish around for something to eat when Omi walks in. 

            "Good morning, Ken…sleep all right?" 

            "Yeah." I grab a box of pre-made waffles and pop a few in the toaster. "Want some waffles?" 

            "Sure." Omi slumps down into one chair. I raise an eyebrow at him. 

            "Up late again on the computer?" He nods warily. 

            "Sorry…" I pretend to examine the box of waffles. 

            "You know what Yohji said about going to those sites when you're under 18…" 

            "Hey!!" He flings a pen at my head, I laugh, Yohji walks in and wonders what's up. 

            "Don't start fighting now, Aya's in a pissy mood." He pushed by me, grabs the box of waffles, drops it on the counter, and starts making himself a cup of coffee to wake him up. Omi gets up and I fish the waffles out of the toaster. He pulls out the syrup, I put the waffles on the plates and grab the forks and knives, we sit down, we eat. Aya comes in as we're eating and seems pleased to see we're all getting along. For once. Of course, not like you can see it on his face. 

            Yohji dunks four frozen waffles in a bowl of syrup and offers one to Aya. He passes, of course. He takes a fifth frozen waffle and puts it in the toaster, then waits for it to pop out. In the mean time Yohji offers him a cup of coffee. 

            I finish my waffles and wash my plate off, and leave it in the sink. I go into the flower shop to start opening up. Saturday's a good selling day, so we need to open up early. I start arranging the flowers, and open the large metal door that usually closes us off from the world. Outside, there's nobody. There's even mist still on the ground from the night before. I start arranging the flowers out in front, and shiver. Damn, it's cold. I should put on my sweater. After all, I'm only wearing a t-shirt! 

            Omi joins me. He shivers, too. 

            "Geeze! It's cold out here." He looks at the sunrise. "Pretty, though." I nod my agreement and move a large pot of flowers. He and I move a small display to it's proper spot, and start putting up flowers. 

            Within five minutes, both Yohji and Aya are inside and working. A small group of girls has gathered, looking for flowers, or luck, from us. I slump down on a chair inside and sigh. Omi can take care of them. 

            After about ten minutes, the small crowd has left, most of them with flowers in hand. September isn't exactly a good month for flowers, but people buy them anyway, hoping to keep them alive in the winter. So we've got a constant stream of people, and eventually I have to take over for Omi. He was the one up all night, and I wasn't. 

~~~ 

            "Weiss, I have a new mission for you." 

            Manx had showed up at the shop about the time we were closing to say Persia had a mission for us. We were a little surprised and excited.  It had been quite a while since our last mission. I personally was ready for a little action. 

            "There is a group of scientists who are trying to create a death weapon from a human. So far, hundreds of people have been kidnapped and died." Pictures of people with their bodies turned inside out, broken, twisted, flash across the screen. I hold back breakfast and lunch. "They were experimented on to find out reactions to certain chemicals. The four men in charge of this must be stopped." Persia 'introduced' us to the four scientists, their current location (very, very vague), and dismissed us. Omi rushed to his computer and had locked down on the location in five minutes. We headed up for our assassin gear and weapons and were out the door faster than usual. 

            We didn't have long to walk. The building was small, but there was obviously some underground to it. Aya was the first to go in, then Yohji, then Omi, then me. Everybody was on high alert. We'd almost been caught when we first came near the building because of a guard. Omi took care of him, though. Gotta love those darts. 

            Carefully, slowly, we make our way through the building, taking out any guards we see on the way. They're vigilant. Makes me nervous. 

            Suddenly, there's an almighty lurch, and a roar. Our heads snap to the ceiling. Everything shaking. 

            "The building's caving in!" Omi yells suddenly. 

           "We have to go!" I say. Aya hesitates to move. He wants to take out the target, but it's not worth getting crushed for! Already the ceiling near us is starting to fall apart. All four of us hightail it to the exit, the way we came in. As soon as we reach the door, the ceiling fall down on us, the walls cave in. 

            Figures. 

            My leg gets caught and I feel something tear into me. Aya flips the rock off my leg and Yohji pulls me out. We stagger back a few feet, and watch the building go up in a cloud of dust. I check my leg. Not much damage, that's good. It's bleeding a little, but I don't really care. The only thing that really got damage were my pants. 

            As we stand up and turn around, Omi partially supporting me, we see four figures standing in the cloud of dust behind us. They're not coughing. They're all tall, minus one. 

            And I can guess who they are. 

            "If it isn't the Weiss kittens," Schuldich purrs as the dust clears. 


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: So we start the angsty-romanc-y part here. I am such an angsty little brat…   
Ironic. I just got a kitten when this was written, and this chapter has a lot of the word 'kitten' in it. 

Angel's Pain 

Written by Sakki-san

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like the building ruins

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like Farfie. 

            Each man faced another, glaring. Aya was glaring at Crawford, Yohji at the smirking Schuldich, Omi watching Nagi, and me looking directly at the knife wielding psycho known only as Farfarello. He's looking at me in a way I don't like. He pulls a knife out of his belt and up to his mouth, and licks it, running the blade from base to tip along his tongue. I repress a shudder and unsheathe my claws. 

            The fight is on almost instantly. I can't see what the others are doing because of the flash of white that charges at me. I whip up my claws and block the knives that are heading for my face. One gold eye is wide open, and pale lips are smirking behind the bars of claws I'm holding up. 

            "Hello, little kitten," he hisses. I snarl in response and fling his knives up, jumping back a few feet. He smiles again, and pulls out more knives. 

            "I am not a kitten." I pull my claws up to my face. "If anything, I'm a full grown tiger." 

            "Siberian…what a perfect name…" He's referring to the Siberian tigers. I snarl and glare at him harder. I expect him to give me one of those this-will-hurt-God looks right before he lunges at me and kills me. Instead, he just smiles. I get nervous…I don't like that smile… "It fits you perfectly…little kitten." Then he flies at me. 

            I push him back, or at least try to. He's attacking furiously, pushing me back, driving me away from the other three fights. He manages to force me back so fast and so far that I can't see anybody else anymore, and I'm stumbling over broken pieces of the building and can't see much other than dust. I cough and wave the air with my hands, trying to clear my vision. 

            Suddenly, something grabs both of my wrists and squeezes. Hard. My fists unclench, my claws retract, and I swear. What's this? I open my eyes, able to see now. 

            Farfarello is standing in front of me, holding my wrists in his hands. I pull and fight and struggle and wonder what the hell he's going to do to me. Probably hurt me, badly. I wonder why he isn't pulling my wrists into one of his hands, so he can reach for a knife to cut me open with. 

            "So the little kitten is alone and at my mercy," he purrs. "I like it." I stare at him, momentarily forgetting that he's a psycho. 

            "Huh? What are you talking about?" He only smiles. 

            I watch him and suddenly realize what he's talking about. He doesn't seem like normal, the psycho who wields knives. He's acting different. The smile is different. More……I can't pinpoint it. 

            He laughs and pulls my arms toward him, leaving only a few inches between my body and his. This is about where I start to get nervous. He puts his face closer to mine. I shut my eyes tight and turn my head to the left. 

            "Ever thought about it?" he whispers into my ear. "The feeling of a knife…" My breath hisses through my teeth. I don't like this. At all. It's too….not-Farfarello. 

            He continues to whisper things into my ear. I pull and struggle and try to get free, but he's unnaturally strong. Again he jerks my arms up, past his head, closing the last few inches between me and him. I can't feel his body yet, but I'm pretty sure another pull will connect us. I'm just praying to God how glad I am he can't read my mind. 

            "If I were Schuldich, I'd know exactly what you were thinking…" God, is he reading my mind, or just guessing?! This can't be good. "Too bad I'm not. Ah…" he leans in closer, and I can feel his breath on my face. I pull back as far as I can, which isn't far, seeing as he's still got my wrists in a death grip. 

            He's getting way too close for comfort. Actually, he was way too close from the minute he grabbed me, but this is beyond what I can stand. I'm about to let loose with a yell when I hear a loud cracking sound, and Farfarello's head snaps to the side. I open my eyes to see him blinking a few times. Something obviously hit his head, and his grip is loosened. I take a chance and rip my arms from him, turn, and run like hell. 

            I'm running, and he's chasing me. I so know it. I can hear him. He's recovered from the initial shock of being hit in the face with a piece of plaster and wants his kitten back. I don't care how much my arms are hurting me, or how much my chest is starting to scream, I want to get AWAY from him. 

            I'm so caught up in my inner monologue with my eyes shut that I don't even notice the piece of broken building in front of me. My foot gets caught under it, I trip, I stumble, I manage not to fall, and I slam into a broken half of a wall that managed to stay up from whatever sent the rest of the building into pieces. I hiss in pain, trying to control myself enough to get up. 

            Something else puts immense pressure on my back. I groan. Then I see the two hands on the wall, about an inch from my head, pale white hands. Farfarello didn't slow down in time to make a good stop, so he just used me as a speed barrier. I hear his purr and a whisper in my ear. 

            "What's the matter, little kitten? Scared?" He laughs. I shiver and start closing my hands into fists. 

            Without warning he has both of my hands secured behind my back with one of his hands, and I feel something ice cold on the back of my neck. It's a knife, I think wildly. He's got a knife and he's going to kill me. 

            The bladed edge runs down the back of my neck and slits open the back of my shirt. I only feel the freezing air on my body and the pain of my arms being twisted unnaturally behind me. I have no idea what he's planning, and I don't really want to know. 

            "Ken!" It's Omi. I can hear Omi! I almost say something, but suddenly, the feeling of the blade is gone, my wrists are free, and I can't feel anything behind me. I turn around. Farfarello is gone, vanished into thin air. Omi runs up to me from the right. 

            "Omi!"

            "Ken! Are you ok? I saw you and Farfarello fighting, but then you two just vanished into the dust, and I got worried…well, we're ok now…they left. Are you ok?" I nod vaguely, still looking around for Farfarello. How did you vanish like that? 

            Omi notices the cut in my shirt. 

            "How did that happen?" 

            "Farfarello…" I stare into the dusty air. Omi pokes me. 

            "We should head back. Aya saw the men we're after, and they're dead…" I nod again and follow him, still confused as to how Farfarello managed an escape like that…and why he was acting the way he did. 


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Ever heard the song 'God Hurts Those He Loves'? It's a Weiss Kreuz song… 

Angel's Pain 

Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like the window. 

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like Ken. (No! Down, Zelly! He's not yours, either!) 

            We get back to the flower shop around ten. I stalk into my room and fling my goggles onto a nearby chair. They land with perfect precision on the edge of the chair, swirl, and sit still, hanging from the corner. Thank you, thank you. I know I'm good. 

            My claws end up on the seat of the chair, and I chuck the rest of my clothes onto the floor. I pull my nightclothes on and flump onto the bed. 'Flump' shouldn't be a noun, but it is in this case. It means I fall backwards onto my bed and lie there, staring at the ceiling. 

            I recover the moments of the day when Farfarello was fighting me, when he was whispering into my ear. I don't remember what he was whispering, mostly because I wasn't listening. I look at my right wrist. It's a little bruised. Was he holding on that tight? He really didn't want me to get away. 

            It's getting warm in here, and it's getting late; I get up, walk over to my window, and open it. Curtains pulled to the sides, inner window up. A cool breeze passes over my face. There's no screen; I took it out a week ago because all the bugs were starting to die and I could leave it open without worry. 

            A few more steps and I'm back to my bed. I curl up under one sheet and drift into a state of half sleep, half awake. 

            I'm like that for about an hour when I hear a scratching near my window. I shake it off as a bug or a mouse or something small and outside and enjoying the heat coming from my room. Another ten minutes, and I'm blasted into consciousness by a shuffling in the corner of my room. A loud shuffling. My head shoots up, my elbows holding me up. 

            "Is somebody there?" Yeah, like that's going to do anything. Of course they're not going to answer if there is someone there. I look around for a few more seconds, then hear another shuffling this one near my door. My gaze moves over there, but I can't see anybody. It's dark in my room. 

            Slowly, I stand up, and walk over to my window. I look around outside for a minute, then shut my window. Another shuffling, closer to my door again. I glare at the door. Now I walk over to it and open it, look around in the hall. Anybody there? Nope. I shut it and turn around. 

            Before I can start walking back to my bed, an arm slides around my waist and locks both my arms to my sides. A second hand clamps firmly over my mouth, and I'm pressed back against someone who's standing behind me. I fight out of shock. There _is someone in my room! _

            I freeze when I recognize the soft chuckling behind me, too close to my ear for comfort. My eyes are wide, focused on the air in front of me. 

            "What's the kitten doing up so late?" Farfarello murmurs into my ear. I can hardly breathe. Why is Farfarello in my room?! How did he know it was my room? Why did he follow us back? 

            And why did the rest of Schwartz let him do it? 

            I can't respond because of the hand over my mouth. Usually, I'd bite his hand, but he can't feel pain, so what's the use? I try to reach up to pull him off my mouth, but his other arm is keeping my arms locked to my sides. I didn't know he was this strong. 

            I try to pull away from him with my entire body. He pulls back, and there's a searing pain in my stomach. I grimace and stop fighting. 

            "I asked you before…have you ever thought of it…the feeling of a knife…?" His left hand moves, I look over, and see that there's a knife in his hand. Where it came from, I don't know. He lines the blade up with my side, the flat edge against my arm, the sharp edge resting on my shirt. I freeze. I don't to be cut. 

            The knife doesn't move. I don't move. He doesn't move. That doesn't last long. He pulls his hand from my mouth. How does he know I'm not going to yell? Because he can slit my throat in an instant, that's why. He pulls another knife out and places it on the back of my neck again. My breath comes out in hisses and gasps. 

            The knife moves down the back of my neck. I wince, because it's cutting into my skin. My shirt is cut open, down to my waist. The shirt itself goes down to my knees. Freezing air rushes onto my skin. 

            I'm not ready for the sudden pain in my back. I gasp and almost cry out, but the arm that was keeping my body still has moved and that hand is now clamped over my mouth. I reach up to try and pull the hand away, but it's in vain. He's unnaturally strong. The knife touches the base of my neck, and digs in. A whimper slides from my throat. My back is cut open, from my neck down to my waist. 

            I loose my strong grip on his hand, but manage to keep holding on. He laughs again, and pushes me to the floor. I collapse on my side. My back hurts, I'm freezing. Farfarello stands over me, smirking. 

            "It hurts God to carve a cross in the back of someone who kills his children." 

            Only then do I realize that the two sharp, searing pains in my back form a cross. One from shoulder blade to shoulder blade, the other from neck to waist. I don't look up at him, but I hear him open and climb out the window. 

            I manage to stagger to my bed a few minutes after he leaves, and I lay there silently, trying to ignore the pain racing through my back. 

~~~ 

            When I wake up the next morning, my first thought is: Farfarello. My second is my back. I pull myself off the bed and gasp painfully. My back was literally ripped off the bed because it was melded there by the blood, which hardened overnight. 

            I look at my sheets. They're stained red. Damn. I wonder how I'll get those changed. Without another thought I go into the bathroom and pull a tall mirror out of the closet. Resting that mirror against the back wall, I pull off my shirt and stand in front of one mirror and look at myself in the other. 

            The cross is vivid on my back. Blood is everywhere on my back. I'll need to take a shower. Do I have time? I check the clock. Yes, I do. I pull my sheets off the bed and throw away my shirt. It was cut open; it's useless now. 

            Into the bathroom I go. I wash off my back, ignore the stinging pain coming from my wounds, and eventually bandage myself. I pull on my usual outfit and head out into the kitchen. 

            Omi's there, and surprisingly, Yohji, too. They both greet me as I come in. I reach for the box of mini-waffles, like the ones we ate yesterday, and find it empty. There's another box in the freezer; I eat those. Three in the toaster. I'm not that hungry. Farfarello's still hanging on the back of my mind. 

            I finish quickly and go to open the shop. Aya's already out there, and everything's set up. I blink. 

            "Oh…thanks, Aya." He nods, I grab a watering can, and start watering flowers. When the first customers start on their way in, I try to forget about most of last night. But I can't forget it because of the feeling that scar on my back makes every time I move my body. 


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I AM AN ANGSTY BITCH! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!! 

…I mean….erm…….mew? 

Angel's Pain

Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like……………..I'm running out of ideas.  

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like the flower shop. (I can't remember the full name.) 

            After that night, I locked my window. It got hot the first night I did it, but I slept all night and didn't wake up once. That was relieving. Farfarello obviously didn't come in. 

            I haven't told Omi, Yohji, or Aya about what happened. They don't seem to suspect anything. I've been trying to act as normal as possible, pushing Farfarello and the scar far into the back of my mind. It has to fade someday, the scar; and Farfarello probably won't come back now that I've locked my window. It was all just a way to try and confuse me. Yeah, that's it. 

            I told myself that for far too long. I wasn't bothered by Farfarello for at least two weeks. By that time, I told myself, he won't be trying to get in. 

            So I left my window unlocked. It brought immense relief and waves of coolness into my unnaturally stuffy room. I lean out the window for a few minutes, taking in as much night air as I can. Soon I turn back around and go to my bed. 

            I haven't been lying there for five minutes when I hear something outside my window. It's a loud, clattering, shuffling sound. I rocket out of my bed and peer out the window. 

            There's nothing out there except a cat around some boxes. I keep looking around. I swear, there had to be something out there other than a cat! I shut the window and look pensively out the window. 

            Something comes up behind me, and I don't know it until an arm snaps around my chest and another around my mouth, pulling me back into the body of someone else. This time I can reach up with my hands to try and pull whoever the offender is off my body, but whoever it is has a really powerful grip. 

            "You shouldn't leave your window unlocked." 

            Farfarello. 

            Has he been waiting outside my window every day for the last two weeks for me to leave the window unlocked?! Now he's got me in another death grip, and I can hardly fight this one. 

            "I see your scar is fading…why don't I cut you a new one?" 

            Has he been watching me, too? What is he, a stalker?! I thought he was a psycho. I didn't think he'd ever take a personal interest in me. Or in anybody else, for that matter. But right now I'm being held against him, fighting, trying to break free. It's useless to try and hurt him, so I'm just using pure strength to try and pull him off me. 

            It's useless. 

            "Fighting is pointless." His arm leaves my chest, and I feel his hand running gently through my hair. My eyes have been shut since the start of this. Now my strength is leaving me. I don't like this at all... 

            My head is pushed against his chest. I'm still fighting, trying to escape, even though what he said was true. Fighting IS pointless. 

            "It's a little hot in here…why are you keeping your window shut?" He laughs. "Is it because you're afraid of me?" I would nod, but I can't move my head. I'm still trying to pry his hand off my face. "You don't need to be afraid of me…just accept it…" 

            Accept what?! I have nothing to accept. I just want to sleep in peace for once. And not have to worry about a psycho Irishman sneaking into my room. 

            His grip on my face relaxes a little. My grip on his hand loosens. Damnit! What's going on here? What am I dong? Why aren't I fighting as hard as I can? 

            I hear him pull a knife from somewhere. His left hand, the one with the knife, is at my neck. The knife is resting at the base of my throat. I can see the silvery coloring of the blade, feeling the ice against my neck. I go rigid. There is no way I am going to let my throat be cut open. Still, I don't move my hands from his hand over my mouth. 

            "I wonder…what would happen if I cut you open right now?" He's silent, thinking it over. "Blood would spill…red…staining your skin, your clothes…" Laughter. Very quiet laughter. Why does he think it's funny? I certainly don't. I'd die. 

            The blade makes a thin cut along my neck. Enough to draw blood, not enough to kill me. Unconsciously I start to sweat. Is he going to kill me? Is he going to do something worse? If he does kill me, who will find me? 

            "Should I do it?" He's talking to himself, but I can hear him. The knife slides up to the place where my neck and my head meet. My head shifts to the side, pulling away from the knife as far as possible. His grip keeps my head from moving a whole lot, though. 

            "Wouldn't it be fun?" Fun? Fun for me to die, to kill me? Maybe for him, but I'm terrified now. The knife is gently scraping along my neck. I pull desperately at the hand clamped over my mouth, try to get free. 

            He laughs, and whispers into my ear. 

            "Don't be so scared, little kitten. I'm not going to kill you." The knife moves down to the collar of my shirt. "Why would I want to? Other than to watch the blood spill, what reason do I have?" The knife cuts into my shirt, slices it open from collar down…down…down to the end of the shirt. The blade twists so it's settled between two of Farfarello's fingers, and his hand lands right over my heart. I can feel my heart beating at a million beats a second, I'm that scared. Right now he could kill me, and I can't do anything to protect myself. Damn him for being immune to pain! 

            He knows I'm scared. Whether he can feel it or smell it, he knows. And he's pushing it, feeding it, forcing the fear to the limit. Sweat streams down my face and chest. His hand pushes against my chest. It's starting to hurt. The force is making it hard to breathe. 

            This goes on for only a few more seconds before I start losing the ability to breathe. I panic. His hand is pushing against my mouth so hard it's getting hard to breath even through my nose, and it feels like he's about to crack my ribs with his other hand. I scratch at his hands, trying to pull them off, trying to tell him I'm dying. He doesn't know. He doesn't know. God, I'm going to _die!!! _

            In one last desperate attempt to get free, I slam my elbows into his stomach. He stumbles back a little, dragging me with him, but his hands slide off to the side due to the force of the blow. I shake him off and pull away, collapse to my knees on the floor, and breathe. I even start coughing. I take deep, hoarse, gasping breaths. All I care about is that I can breathe. 

            It takes him less than a second to whip me back up to his chest. But this time he only clamps one hand over my mouth. His other hand, the one with the knife, moves in front of me. I catch a split second of the knife being held normally again when it moves out of my range of view. 

            Then comes the pain. Again. The same pain he used on me before, two weeks ago, on my back. But this time it's on my chest. I claw at his hand, then just grip, to try and get hold of the pain. He carves another cross into me: one line from shoulder to shoulder across my collarbone, another from neck to waist. And this time he cuts me deep. 

            I expect him to throw me down again, laugh, and leave, but he doesn't. He pulls my head back into his chest harder, so hard I'm afraid my head will crack open. He'd love that. Hurt God, indeed… 

            "God is hurting," he says. "God will hurt even more when I'm done with you." 

            My head is twisted sharply to the side, and everything goes black. 


	6. Chapter 6

  
A/N: I'll tell you here and now: I have an obsession with torture and pain of male characters. Attractive male characters. This should explain why I'm such an angsty bitch. 

Angel's Pain 

Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. Like the song I use in this chapter (anything in { }). 

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like Ken. 

And Shavica…I like your reviews, but that one for Chapter 5 was a bit strange…o_O I take it you were angry…? 

            Omi says I was having a nightmare and fell off the bed. Aya and Yohji accepted the story, but I'm pretty sure Omi suspects something else happened. 

            He said that when he called me for breakfast and I didn't come, he got worried. So he went to my door and knocked. When I didn't answer, he got even more worried. He opened the door. 

            He said he saw me lying on the floor, silent, like I was dead. He ran over to me and saw the blood. He cleaned me up and put me back in my bed. No, he didn't tell Aya or Yohji about the blood. He cleaned that off the floor, and neither of them has been in to see me yet. 

            Only I know what really happened, why I was lying there on the floor. Actually, I'm not entirely sure why I was there, but I guess Farfarello finished with me faster than I thought. 

            Why my head twisted to the side was to knock me unconscious. I'm guessing that, with me unconscious, Farfarello cut me up a little more and tossed me on the floor. It was that simple. How do I know he cut me up more than just the cross in my chest? 

            There were slashmarks on my arms, Omi said. And they were bandaged up. 

            Now I really look like Farfarello. My skin's getting pale, I've got bandages along my lower arms and around my chest, and I'm getting a sort of blank stare. Omi's been wondering why I was bleeding, but he hasn't asked me anything other than, "Need more painkillers?" or, "Are the bandages holding up?". Things like that. He cares. A lot. Sometimes I wish I could be more like him. 

            So I'm laying on my bed, my eyes shut, dazing between sleep and awakeness. I'm a little more tense then usual, but since it's daylight, I'm not so scared of Farfarello coming in. I begged Omi to shut my window this morning when I woke up. 

            While I'm lying there, I hear the door open. I open my eye just enough to see who's coming in. I'm surprised at who I see and quickly shut my eye. 

            Aya! 

            He sits down on the chair next to my bed and watches me. I pretend to be asleep, breathing lightly. He reaches out and gently pushes some of my bangs off of my eyes. I struggle not to blush, because you don't do that when you're asleep. Instead, I shift my body slightly. 

          I think he reached out to brush away my hair again when he noticed the bandages on my chest. How did I know this? There was a sudden lack of light on my face, then hesitation, then the feeling of the sheets being pushed down my chest a little, revealing the bandages. He's being incredibly stealthy, so as not to wake me. 

            He looks at the bandages, then pulls the sheet back up and sits where he is. I turn on my side to make it look like I'm dreaming. I hear him get up and leave, shutting the door quietly behind him. 

            Then – 

            "Why is he wearing bandages?" Silence. 

            "…what are you talking about?" Omi's voice. Omi and Aya are talking. 

            "Don't play stupid." A sigh. 

            "He…cut himself. I'm not sure how, but he did it." 

            "He cut himself and it got infected? Is that why he's sick?" 

            "Yeah…" More silence. I can't help but feel curious, but I can't move. What if one of them walks in? What if the door's open? 

            "I don't believe you." Receding footsteps. Omi sighs, and leaves as well. I cringe internally. Is Aya going to find out about Farfarello? What's he going to do if he does? Damnit, why me? 

            So I'm sick. Omi forgot to tell me that part of it. I was feeling a little off color ever since Farfarello snuck in. Maybe it's the man's mere presence that causes me to be nervous. 

            This is so weird. What does he want with me, anyway? Usually, he would kill me, but he said he had no reason to kill me. Which is strange, because he always has a reason to kill someone. Hurt God, that's what his reason is. 

            Why am I not dead yet? 

            I lay on my back and trace the new scar on my chest through the bandages. It hurts a little, but not a lot. Not enough to change my facial expression, anyway. I sigh. Omi walks in. 

            "Oh, you're awake." He's coming in sideways, holding a tray. Must be dinner. I sit up and take it from him, lay it on my legs, and poke at the food. 

            "Who did the cooking?" 

            "Yohji." 

            "That would explain the canned soup and frozen waffles…" Omi laughs a little. 

            "At least you're feeling better. Eat something, and I'll get some more painkillers." 

            "I don't need them." He looks over at me from the entry to the bathroom. 

            "Oh…um, Ken…I wanted to ask you something." I stop eating, the spoon halfway to my mouth. 

            "…what?" 

            "I'm pretty sure you didn't hurt yourself by falling off your bed in a nightmare. Something else must have happened." 

            I knew he'd ask that eventually. Omi's too smart to believe his own lies, even for a second. But what should I tell him? That the psycho member of Schwartz snuck in here and sliced me open? That he didn't just cut open my chest, but my back, too? I have no idea what I'm supposed to say. 

            "Are you…well…suicidal?" I drop the spoon. 

            "Wh-what?! No! I'm not suicidal!" I wince. That was a bit too much air for me. He hurries over to me. 

            "Ok, ok…I didn't think so. You're the sane one, and I kind of wondered how you could cut your back like that…" 

            So he knows. He must have known, when he bandaged my front. 

            "How long was your back like that?" 

            "…around two weeks." That can't do any harm. Tell him how long, keep away from who did it. 

            "Who did it to you?" 

            Damn. 

            "…" I gaze off into space, trying to look like I can't remember, or that I'm trying to recall it. He watches me for a moment. 

            "Can you remember?" I shake my head. It's a lie, but I'd rather not tell him the truth. "Ok…well, just call if you need anything." He quietly shuts the door as he leaves. 

            I ponder telling him while looking at my soup. If I can tell anybody, it's Omi. He'd never spill a secret. Aya and Yohji would never know. I want to tell him so badly…!!! 

            But I can't. He'd either not believe me or something worse. And what if Aya or Yohji overheard? Then I'd really be screwed. They'd think I had something to do with all of this. 

            I can't trust them. 

            The sun is starting to set. I'm quiet as it does. My window is locked, my door is shut. I'm fine. Farfarello can't come in. 

            Right? 

            I mean, I had my window locked for two weeks, and he never came in. Then last night I opened my window and he got in. So I'm safe. 

           But even as I put the tray of food on the floor and lay down, I'm nervous. God, I'm getting paranoid. Just relax, Ken, just relax… 

            I can't breathe. 

            Something is keeping me from breathing. I don't know what, but I can't move, either. I struggle violently in my drugged sleep – damn Omi for putting those drugs in my food! – but whatever's out there has a tight grip on me. 

            Is it Farfarello? My movements are sluggish and slow. It's unbearably hot, I can tell that, and I feel numb. I can hardly control my arms and legs, and even my torso. 

            A hand rests on my forehead, and I realize this must be a friendly visitor. Your mind works in weird ways during the night. It's easier to breathe now. I stop fighting altogether, and I can breathe just fine. 

            Someone is talking. I don't know who because I can't open my eyes. The voice sounds familiar, but the words aren't… 

            …familiar… 

            {_Sunlight fading; _

_            Daylight gone; _

_            Sleep, little one, please _

_            Sleep my little kitten…} _


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: O_O Seven chapters?! This is an all time record for me. Sort of. I NEVER write this much…not a serious story, anyway….with the exception of that one story… 

Angel's Pain 

Written by Sakki-san 

Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. The song, for one. 

Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. Like basically everything else. 

            I can hardly open my eyes, I'm so tired. They open slowly, fighting me the whole way. There's someone standing over me, someone with red hair. 

            "…Aya?" I blink profusely to try and focus the blurry image above me. Aya's face is hovering just above mine, and then Omi's comes into view. "Wha…" 

            "Are you ok, Ken?" Omi sounds worried. 

            "He should be ok…" Yohji's here, too? I try to turn my head, but my muscles won't respond. 

            "I'm sorry, Ken! I didn't tell you about the drugs in your food, but I wanted you to sleep…and…I didn't know it would make you this sick!" 

            I'm sick? The drugs made me sick? Aya's face looks normal, but in his eyes I can see a shade of worry. 

            "I thought you might have ended up in a coma…" 

            Me? In a coma? That would never happen, would it, Omi? 

            "I'm sorry, Ken." He sounds so apologetic. 

            "He's awake, Omi, relax a little." Yohji appears in my vision. He pokes my nose. 

            "…don't." He laughs. 

            "See? He's fine." Then Yohji sits down. "If Aya hadn't come in, God knows what would have happened." 

            Aya came in? 

            "Ano…?" Omi looks at Aya, Aya doesn't move. 

            "…Last night, when we were up watching TV, Aya thought he heard something in your room and went to check on you…he came back out and said you looked like you were dying." 

            Slowly, I shut my eyes. Was that Aya in my room last night? Was he the hand on my forehead…? 

            "Ken?! Ken!!!" Omi's yelling, shaking me, but I can't feel it. I'm so tired…I think I'll sleep… 

            _I know I've been here before. It's familiar, this forest and this cabin. It seems a little smaller than I remember, but that's ok, I've grown up. _

_            I look down and see my feet. I'm wearing my assassin gear. Oh well, that doesn't matter much. This is just a dream, right? I start walking, one foot in front of the other, and look back to see if I'm moving. Yep, there are my footprints. _

_            The forest is pretty, and it's exactly how I remember it, down to the last tiny detail. Even the sky is exactly as I saw it when I was little. The same clouds, that one in the shape of a dog, that one in the shape of a duck. I smile a little and keep walking. A breeze pushes my hair out of my eyes. _

_            As I'm walking, I find myself getting closer to a lake. The lake is also familiar, the same boats on it, the same ripples from the waterbugs. I stop at the very edge and look down. I can see faint rocks, but mostly blackness. Curiosity gets the better of me. I crouch down and lower my hand to touch the water. _

_            Something slams into my back. I'm shoved forward and fly headfirst into the water. My first thoughts are oh shit, what the hell just happened?! Now I'm starting to remember why I don't like lakes. _

_            I struggle to get to the surface, but there's something clutching my leg. I reach down and try to find whatever's holding onto me, so I can get it off. I can't feel anything. My arms flail wildly, my legs kick, I try to get to the surface. Something is dragging me down. I can't get up. I can't breathe. _

_            My hand manages to graze the very top of the water before I vanish back under again. I struggle and try to hold in my breath, but there's shadows and waving monsters all around me so I scream. Bubbles escape my mouth. I try to breathe and choke on water. I try to cough and choke on more water. My lungs scream at me to find air, but I keep sinking despite what I do to get back up. _

_            After a few more seconds, everything starts getting hazy. My body feels weak, my arms stop struggling, and my legs stop kicking. I drift under the water on my back and look up at the sky, refracted and shattered sunlight above my gauzy vision. _

_            Everything suddenly goes black. The water around me, the world above me. I see ripples as somebody reaches down to see if they can find something. Are they looking for me? Maybe they dropped something in, or maybe they're just resting their hand, or cooling their hand down. As I keep sinking, I feel soft hands on my skin. Nice, calm hands, webbed hands, pulling me down lower and lower, relaxing me. _

_            Bubbles fly down to greet me. The hands vanish. Somebody grabs the front of my jacket and drags me up, up…and drops me…_

_            Now I remember why I don't like lakes…I drowned in one when I was…yes. I drowned…and they said they would save me, but they didn't…they couldn't, because somebody else came, but then they dropped me. Their hands slipped, the rain started, the lightning, the thunder. I can still see it now, the beauty of streaks of light above my eyes as I lay on the soft sand with seaweed against my skin and fish floating by. _

_            There's a person above me. A bright light flashes in my eyes, and I scream, but nothing comes out of my mouth, not bubbles, not air, nothing. No sound. I'm picked up and brought out of my peaceful state by the sudden feeling of air on my face. I cry out a little. It hurts so badly to be out here. _

_            When I cry out, water flies from my mouth. Someone turns my head to the side, and I feel a hard, solid ground under me. There's a strong force on my stomach, and I cough up more water. So much water even I'm surprised. But I can't open my eyes. They hurt enough as it is. _

_            I start taking deep, gasping breaths, and suddenly all my pain rushes back to me. I start crying but don't know it because I'm already soaked. I hear voices, loud voices, all around me, the sound of thunder, of rain hitting the water. It's all so loud and painful and my chest hurts and my stomach hurts and I'm freezing cold and suddenly I'm being carried and now I'm burning up and please God kill me, please God, please!!! _

_            I never exactly went into unconsciousness, which made it hell. I felt myself being stripped of my clothes, but I was still burning hot. Then I was freezing again. I just went back and forth between the two forever. Eventually I open my eyes and scream again. It's so bright!!! _

            "Ken!!!" 

            "O…mi…?" I blink a few times to try and fight off the brightness of the light. Omi's standing over me, next to a really powerful light. I look around vaguely. Where am I…? 

            "Ken!" He looks so relieved. "You're ok! Oh, God, I was afraid you were dead. You're in a hospital." I wonder briefly why I'm here, then remember before that hell of a nightmare happened. 

            "Uh…oh…ok…" Omi leans forward in his chair a little bit. 

            "Aya was really worried." I blink. 

            "Aya?" It seems a little unlikely that Aya would be worried about me. 

            "Yeah," Omi nods, "He was the one who drove you down here. He made me stay in the waiting room and tell them what they needed while he got you a room…" Omi looked over as the door opens and a nurse steps in. 

            "Oh, is he awake?" the nurse asks pleasantly. Omi nods with a smile. "Well, that's good. It's ok. He only suffered from a minor infection." 

            Infection? 

            "That's great," Omi says, sounding relieved. 

            "Also…" Omi looks at the nurse, confused. "He seems to have some stress issues. I think," the woman continues, "that there's something happening…?" 

            Omi looks at me, and I look away. He nods. The nurse leaves. 

            "I know there's something happening." I'm silent. "You wouldn't carve a cross into your own back, or into your arms, or into your chest." I'm still silent. He frowns and gently touches my arm. "Ken…please, if there's something wrong, tell me." 

            I don't say anything. Omi's looking at me with pleading eyes, but I can't tell him. I can't, because he'll tell Aya and Yohji, and then they'll all get together to kill Farfarello, which will eventually end up in them getting hurt. 

            But what if I make him promise not to tell?... 

            He's starting to leave. 

            "Omi." My voice is hoarse, but he hears it, and sits back down. 

            "Ken?" I take a breath, cough, and try again. 

            "I-it's…not self inflicted…it's…Fa…" I cough again. This time, the next breath I take is more ragged, and Omi grabs me a cup of water. I drink it, thankful for Omi's kindness. "I was trying to say…it was……Farfarello." 

            His eyes widen, and I continue. 

            "He…I was just in my room one night, and I thought I heard something, and he…he showed up…" I reposition myself so I'm sitting upright, but hunched over my cup of water. "He cut my back…but I cleaned that up." Omi nods approvingly, still looking shocked. "So I locked my window, but then I unlocked it…he came in again…and…….and……" I feel tears starting in my eyes and crush the cup of water in my hand. No! I will not cry! 

            "Cut your chest?" Omi finishes for me. I nod. "Ken…I had no idea…" He looks like he's about to say something more compassionate, but instead, his face sets into a serious mode. "I have to tell Aya and Yohji about this." 

            "No!" The force in my voice shocks both of us. I grab Omi's arm. "No…don't tell them. I don't want you to." 

            "But…Ken-kun…why not?" Omi's staring at me, blinking. 

            "Because if you do, they'll try and get him to stop…and then he'll know I told them, and…what will he do to me then?...Omi, just…please. Don't." 

            Either he was thinking the same thing I was or he succumb to the desperation in my voice, but Omi's eyes softened and he pulled my hand off his arm. 

            "It's ok, Ken-kun…I understand…I won't tell them." 

            I lay back down on the bed, weak with relief. Somebody comes into the room. At first I think it's a nurse, but then Omi speaks. 

            "Hi, Aya." 

            "How's Ken?" 

            "He's awake." 

            "There's a doctor outside that wants to talk to you." Omi nods, stands up, and leaves. 

            "Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid," Omi calls as he shuts the door. Aya sits down in the chair next to my bed. I don't feel like moving. 

            Aya picks up my hand and puts it against his lips. I relax after a slight shock at the sudden show of affection. It's nice to know that someone cares… 

            He puts down my hand and brushes the hair out of my face. I feel like sleeping, but then I hear his voice softly singing a song that seems familiar but… 

            …isn't… 

            {_Sunset fading; _

_            Daylight gone; _

_            Sleep, little one, _

_            Please sleep my little kitten. _

_            Sleep, sleep and dream of _

_            Far away…} _


	8. Chapter 8

            Angel's Pain 

            Written by Sakki-san 

            Anything you haven't heard of belongs to me. 

            Anything you HAVE heard of, doesn't. 

            They took me home after a day or two of being in the hospital. I spent the next few days after that in my room, sleeping mostly. My window was locked tight. I felt happy, relaxed, knowing that Farfarello couldn't come in. Soon, I was back working in the shop, acting normal. I couldn't feel the scars on my chest or my back when I worked, thanks to Aya's skills in healing. I didn't know he was so good at dealing with wounds. Maybe it's a prerequisite for an assassin? 

            I never even considered that any day might be my last, that Farfarello might be seething in the shadows, unable to get at his prey, waiting to strike the moment my guard was down. I was foolish and stupid. 

            It all ended in a matter of hours. 

            To begin, Omi was going out to study with a friend one night, and left the shop early to do so. Yohji claimed to have a date, and Aya was going in to talk with Manx about our last mission. This left me to close up the shop alone. Omi had expressed concern over this, but I assured him I was fine. 

            "Come on, Omi. What's the worst that could happen?" 

            The look he gave me…he knew. He knew Farfarello might come. He knew the danger I was in. But he smiled anyway and told me to be careful, and to not let anyone else in. Then he left. 

            Yohji followed shortly after. 

            "Don't go running around outside," he commented as he left, brushing strands of hair over his shoulder. "It's gonna rain, and we don't want you to end up in the hospital again." 

            "Thanks, Yohji," I mutter sarcastically, but inside, I'm twisting with shame. I don't like to lie to people. Well, I didn't lie specifically TO Yohji and Aya – Omi did – but I still feel terrible. 

            Last to leave was Aya. He watched me for several minutes before he left, just sitting at the table, his eyes following me as he picked at a snack he'd snatched from the fridge. It made me nervous, but I tried to pay attention to the last-minute customers instead of him. 

            Finally, he stood up and left. He looked at my face as he left. I turned, my face going slightly red as he did it, but I could still feel his eyes piercing the back of my head. At last he was gone. 

            It started to rain, just a light drizzle, a few minutes after Aya left. I started cleaning up the shop, but failed to lock the door or pull down the metal door covering. I didn't think anyone would mind; some people might even stop by to get some flowers. The sign on the shop said closed, however, so I doubted it. 

            As I had my back to the door and was sweeping up some leftover flower petals, I heard the door open and close. 

            "I'm sorry, but we're closed." I set the broom and turned around. "If you'd like to bu…." 

            My voice sticks in my throat. My limbs stop working. My blood freezes in my veins. 

            Standing in the doorway is Farfarello. 

            The lights flicker off suddenly with a flash of lightning and a boom of thunder. It's like something out of a horror movie. I can only see his outline against the dim light from outside, but I know he's there. 

            I can also see when he pulls a knife from his pocket and runs it along his tongue because it glimmers demonically in the light which creates his outline. 

            "So…," he says softly. "The kitten is left all alone to close up the shop. What a sad story…" His hand reaches up to close the metallic door, and now I can't see anything. The shop is completely dark and empty. 

            This is about when life returns to my body, and I stagger back in shock. I crash into a wall almost instantly. Desperately, I try to hear for Farfarello, but I can't. Damnit! Why does he have to be as quiet as that stupid German freak?! 

            "A kitten." 

            The words are so sudden in the dark that I jerk in surprise. Then I realize that they're coming from somewhere nearby, off to my right, and that happens to be the same direction in which the door to the kitchen is. I scramble around frantically until I find the doorknob, twist, and stumble through the open door. 

            "They're strong and defensive on the outside…but if you work hard enough…" 

            I slam the door shut, not wanting to hear any more. My back is pressed to the wooden surface and my chest is heaving. I can hear my heart in my ears, going a million beats a minute. 

            Oh, please, God, don't let him come in…please, God, please… 

            I know that praying is useless, but maybe, just maybe, God will save me from someone who hates him as much as Farfarello does. 

            Something explodes next to my ear. I fly away from the door and just about trip over a chair. Pieces of wood clatter to the floor, and I stare in horror at the area where the door should be as more explosions emerge. 

            He's actually trying to break through the door. I locked it and he's trying to get through. Oh my God. Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit. 

            I don't know what he wants. Why is he so desperate to get to me?! I fumble for the light switch and hit it. 

            Nothing happens. 

            So the power is out. I hear another explosion, and then something like the door being unlocked. 

            Suddenly, everything fits into place. He wasn't trying to break down the door. He was trying to make a hole in the door so he could put his hand through and simply open the door from my side. 

            I rip off my apron and fling it to the floor. My claws. I need my claws! They're in my room. In the dark I can't find my way around very well, but I know vaguely where the door is. I grope around along the walls with my right arm. 

            Something grabs my left arm. I pull away in alarm, only to receive an even stronger pull in response. I'm yanked away from the wall and crash into something strong. Strong, but not a wall. 

            "…then they're easily scared…manipulated…and broken." 

            He put the emphasis on those three last words, as if to prove a point I couldn't find yet. 

            Farfarello is holding me in place with one hand. I'm pulling away, and quickly turn to try and pry my wrist out of his grip with my free arm. The window in the kitchen is lit up with a blast of lightning, and I can partially see his scarred face, the eyepatch, and a smirk. I stop moving and stare at his face in terror. 

            His hand – the one not holding my wrist – grabs my shoulder and whips me around, so my back is to him again. Then he crushes me against him with that hand. 

            "Such a sad tale," he says again. "The little kitten, abandoned by his family, is left to the wild predators… 

            "Some of them will kill him and eat him. Others might take him in as a pet or a hunter. But then there are those that will stalk him, follow him, and bring him to his wit's end…" 

            "…and then kill him," I finish for him breathlessly. He's quoting a book I read once. I didn't know Farfarello read much. 

            "Good kitten." 

            Suddenly, I feel him pushing me forward. He's heading for the wall…no, for the door… 

             I'm frozen as he shoves me through the closed door, which leads to the back of the flower shop. To the briefing room, and to the bedrooms. To my bedroom. A sob of terror escapes me, and I feel a laugh in his chest. 

            "What's the matter, kitten? Scared?" 

            He pushes open my door with one foot and shoves me onto the floor before stepping in. I stagger up and desperately try to find my desk. That's where my claws are. That's where my salvation is. 

            A foot slams into my back. I'm forced onto the floor and the air is knocked out of me. While I try to regain my breath, he shuts the door and picks me up by the back of my t-shirt. Then he drags me a short distance across the room and drops me on the bed. 

            Again, I sob in fright, and lash out with my fists and feet, trying to hit him and force him away. I catch him in the stomach with one foot, and he staggers back. I fall off the bed and crash to the floor, where a sudden weight suddenly forces it's way between my shoulder blades. 

            "What a naughty kitten," he scolds. "Trying to attack me." His heel digs into my back even harder. I cry out. "I'll need to teach you a lesson in obedience…" 

            "No!" I choke out as he picks me up again. I punch at him, aiming for his body. He whips out a knife, which I don't see. 

            Suddenly, I scream. My hand is burning with pain, and I grab it with my unhurt hand. He cut me! He cut me! I can't think of anything besides my bleeding fingers. 

            I scream again as he seizes my injured arm and digs the knife into it. I continue screaming until he slams my head against the side of the bed, which wood, and holds me there. I try to scream in a dazed state, but his knife arm is crushing my mouth. My free hand claws desperately at his arm to try and get it off. He ignores me. 

            Blood seeps down my arms as he viciously digs into my skin. Muffled screams reach deaf ears. Crosses are carved into me again and again, all down my arms, both of them. He doesn't seem to care that blood is getting all over both me and him, and that he's partially suffocating me with his arms. 

            Finally, he stops, but my screaming continues. He clamps one hand firmly over my mouth and presses my head against the wooden frame until I stop screaming. My fingers twitch while blood flows evenly down my arms. 

            One pale white hand grabbed my throat and dragged me onto the bed. I had no idea what his intentions were, not even when he pulled himself on top of me, kneeling so one leg was on either side of my body. 

            "This little kitten is already injured." He slices open my shirt and rips off the bandages that kept my scars from getting infected. After inspecting his handiwork, he digs the knife back into my chest, retracing the crosses, only deeper. His free hand is clamped around my throat, tight enough so that I can't breathe or scream. I reach up with bleeding arms to try and force him off me. 

            I'm far too weak. The blood loss is starting to get to me. 

            His thumb jerks up under my chin and forces my head back. I choke and gasp, able to breathe slightly, but not able to speak. I feel him lean forward, feel his breath on my neck. 

            "Can you feel it?" he says softly, his voice moving closer to my ear. "Can you feel the blood streaming down your arms? Can you hear the screaming in your body for more blood? Can you taste it?" He makes a cut on my face and licks away the first few drops of blood. "The blood…fresh and sweet…and burning hot…" 

            He's right…the blood is burning my arms. It's boiling in my veins, pouring out of my body, and burning the flesh right off my bones. A hoarse cry of despair slides from my throat. 

            He chuckles. 

            "Have you given up yet, kitten?" he asks, his breath in my ear. "Are you going to stop fighting?" 

            Was I ever fighting in the first place? I want to scream and die. I want him to kill me. I want him to leave me alone. I want this nightmare to end. 

            I let another breath leave my throat, thin and ragged. His hand was latched onto my throat tight enough to bruise it, and as he drags his hand off my neck and down my chest, I almost whimper. 

            I feel his breath moving across my face now, his hands roaming down my body. I can't fight. The blood loss is too massive for me to fight back any more. There's a presence just above my lips, about to lock down on mine and take me away from this world forever… 

            Dimly, I hear an explosion. Farfarello's head jerks up, and his lips vanish from just above mine. My eyes, which were shut this entire time, open slightly, and I see that someone has burst into the room, eyes flashing dangerously, sword drawn… 

            _Aya?!_

            Farfarello hissed and drew knives from his body, only to meet a kick to the chest and be flung across the room. He crashed into the wall. The tip of a sword was instantly between his eyes. 

            "You," Aya hissed as a beginning, "will never come near Ken again." 

            Farfarello was silent. 

            "You will never come back to this place. You will leave him alone." 

            There was no response. 

            "If you do come back," he said, his voice so quiet I could barely hear it, "I will kill you. Without hesitation. And I will leave your lifeless body in a church so the priests can find it." 

            This hits a nerve. I can tell, because I hear a long, slow hiss from the Irishman before he slowly stands up, watching the blade between his eyes. He stalks to the window, and climbs out. Aya shuts and locks it. 

            Abruptly, he drops the katana and rushes over to me. He wraps my arms in the already blood-soaked sheets and cradles my head against his chest. 

            "I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner…" He yanks whatever sheets aren't already stained and uses them to wrap up my body, slowing but not stopping the massive blood flow. 

            Carefully, he picks me up, and carries me out of the Koneko. 

Outside, it's raining. 

Pouring. An unstopping flood of water. It rushes over my face, and I stare up at the clouds, remembering a life long past and a world long lost. 

As I stare at the hazy world around me, I realize that my fears have not been permanently dissolved, but rather heightened to an almost unbearable amount… 

…But for now…as a comforting soul carries me to a hospital for the treatment I never received as a child…

I think I can handle it. 

~Owari~ 


End file.
